Another week has passed, and here I am sitting, Blessed by the grace of God. I had a very long and depressing week but I am thankful it passed and I am doing well.
Fear or just Not-Willing
I was thinking this whole week about my situation of trying or let me rather say working towards my goals. I am a Credit Advisor, my 8-5 job. While I am working there I am studying part time to become a fitness professional. I am so excited and hyped up about it, I can’t explain.
But I feel I am not giving my All… I have this thing of limiting myself. Yes, I’ve reached my goal to start my studies the exact time I said I will do it, Yes, my short term goal is to enter a Fitness Centre or Gym to just get started with a solid foundation. I actually need to do that as I still need a mentor. But I am doing nothing, or not enough! I contacted a fitness Instructor already, I phoned a Gym(but fitness manager weren’t available) never called again… I tried contacted a Biokineticist, but also didn’t follow up… Just because I am scared of rejection OMW! It started to look like I am planning to fail more and more… I do have the resources and the support I need, but I am stuck in my comfort zone.
Want things to be too Easy
I grew up in a small town, when I was 19yrs old I worked already and lived on my own. I was living walking distance away from work, got myself a car when I turned 20yrs old. I made sure I don’t have to travel, ask people for help and I could walk to work too.
Now I am a grown up woman, a wife and a mother. But I did not change one bit.
When I moved to Cape Town, I told my husband we’ll be getting a place close to work, I will not put my foot in a taxi, bus or train. Wow, I don’t think there is anything wrong with this, however, I am just being difficult! When I look at some young girls traveling to University or College, also grew up in small towns They are doing it because they know it’ll pay off at the end of the day. I really feel bad.
Let me cut the long story short, I need to pull my socks up if I want to succeed. Most of the places are in Cape Town, Sea Point ect. and I am just unwilling to drive their because I am scared. My fear for driving to town is tremendously high!
Time Management and Prioritizing
So, I am knotting down everything on paper. My short term goals, how I am going to manage my time daily. I figured out the reason why I keep falling into depression and discouragement , it’s because of my lack of planning.
I get overwhelmed when I get home, need to clean, spend time with my son and husband. Need to study and get a daily workout…
But now I know what I must do to make a success of this. Plan, Write it down, Implement and take Action.
I decided to not want to give 100% But 110%, because should I fail to be able to reach that 110% because of unforeseen circumstances I can be at peace because I then gave atleast my 100%. It is much better THAN to end up giving 80% or 90%